I DO

I do, those are two very small insignificant words it would seem, but in the context of a marriage they are very powerful. Two human beings coming together in matrimony. The God whom we serve is the creator of the earth and the universe. He is omnipotent or all powerful. He is omniscient, which is all knowing. He is omnipresent or everywhere. So he designed man and woman that the two should leave the parents of their birth join together in marriage and become one flesh. During the wedding ceremony the couple to be says these two very significant words, "I Do". What exactly is it that they do? Well the wedding vows say this,"I, (Bride/Groom), take you (Groom/Bride), to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part."

So two consenting adults make these profound statements to each other in front of witnesses proclaiming their love and commitment to each other. The bible teaches us that marriage is supposed to be permanent, yet by today's standards we know that most marriages don't last. A lot of people in today's world are motivated by greed, self centeredness and me and I. You know I before me and me before you. Its no wonder marriage as an institution is suffering as a whole. Because of the latitude of women in the workforce, and the unclear roles that the partners play in the social dynamics of traditional marriages between a man and a woman. Things have become cloudy and distorted, and so when couples find themselves confronted with problems it is easier to opt out rather than to work through them no matter how severe.

  The black male also has to decide that being in a monogamous committed relationship is just that. A monogamous committed relationship. These applies to all men, but black males who come from the urban experience where positive male role models are absent has this as a profound problem, We grow up misguided and uninformed about the standards necessary to sustain and keep a significant other or wife without the complications of another lover or girl being in the relationship. We have to do better guys....

The consequences for our society as a whole are disastrous in my opinion. It is why here in the United States we have such high incarceration rates and genocide in some of our ethnic communities. Our children are being raised in socially hostile environments because two stable parents as role models are missing. We also have evidence of children from divorced parents becoming social recluses, so the damage is evident.

So what is the solution? We could start with our wedding vows by taking them more seriously and realizing when we take them that they are forever and failure or divorce is not an option, That has to be taken completely off the table, except in a very extreme circumstance or condition. Finally the bible says to neither swear by heaven or by the earth, because heaven is God's throne and the earth is his footstool, simple let your yes mean yes and your no to mean no. So if you get married go into it realizing that it is for life, and mentally prepare yourself to do what it takes to make it work. Combine that with the spiritual guidance one can receive from becoming a practicing christian and your chances for success go way up in my opinion.